How Charlotte Mason Keeps Me Sane

When I look back at the last ten years of my life, it seems as if my family has been catapulted from one major life change or crisis to the next with hardly a lull. And yet, these tumultuous years have been good and happy and productive. I think almost by definition, the life of a young and growing family is bound to be full of surprises and chaos. Babies are delicious disruptions to order; and if you throw some medical issues, interstate moves, and job changes into the mix, you’ve got a roller-coaster ride, all right.

I get a lot of letters from mothers wanting to know how we manage to keep up our studies during all the chaos. My answer boils down to: tidal homeschooling and Charlotte Mason.

The lovely thing about a Charlotte Mason education is that you get a lot of bang for your buck. Simply put, it doesn’t take much time. Right now I’ve got three "school-aged" kids in the house, plus the special-needs three-year-old and the baby. The girls and I spend about three mornings a week on our Charlotte Mason-style lessons. This couch time, though often interrupted by diaper changes and toddler crankiness, is a gentle and truly delightful way to live and learn.

I am not the mother who sews gorgeous clothes, or paints rooms and furniture, or makes pancakes for breakfast on a weekday. If you know me in person, you quickly find out that my closets are always a disaster and my dinners are nothing to write home about. But by golly, I can cuddle up on the couch and read aloud with the best of ’em. I am the read-aloud queen. Give me a living book and a comfy cushion, and I’ll give you a well-educated child.

Around here, evenings are dicey. Come 5 p.m., I’m fighting the urge to sack out in front of Good Eats with the younguns. If only Rachael Ray would waltz in and whip up a 30-minute meal while the gang and I are learning about enzymes and lipids from Alton Brown, I’d be a happy camper. Dinnertime is not my forte, no sirree-bob. I’ll take the couch over the kitchen any day.

And that’s my answer to the "how do you do it" question. I pick out good books—and even there, most of the work has been done for me by my heroes at Ambleside Online—and I gather my brood, and we nestle in and read. Read them good books, let them tell everything back to you, and voila! It’s the simplest recipe for education I know, and truly, it’s a nourishing meal plan for mind and spirit. Now that’s good eats!

Related posts:
Reluctant narrators
Rose’s reading list
A CM term (Jane’s list)
CM on nourishing the mind
Big CM post

Defeating the Purpose

Note to self: When one truly desires to keep the tablecloth clean, one must select BORING placemats for the St. Valentine’s day breakfast feast. INTERESTING placemats, such as those featuring U.S. Presidents or the periodic table of the elements, will inevitably be moved out from underneath the breakfast plates and held out of the way of the shower of crumbs which might impede a child’s view of, say, Roosevelt or helium.

The Cybils Are Announced

The winners of the Cybils, or Children’s and Young Adult Bloggers Literary Awards, have been announced over at Fuse #8.
If you’d like to see which books won the hearts of the kidlitosphere in
2006, hop on over for a look. In our year of upheaval (new baby, new
job, new home in a new state), I didn’t do much reading of newly
published books, so I haven’t read a single one of the winners. Yet.

(I’m
back in the game now, though; my drafts folder is once again beginning
to fill up with reviews-in-progress. Ah, the bliss of Ordinary Time…)

In other book-blog news:

Did  you see the 7 Impossible Things interview with kidlit blogger Kelly Herold of Big A little a and The Edge of the Forest? I just love a chance to get to know the person behind the blog. Terrific interview.

And call me a proud mama, but I’m just tickled that my made-up word has now made it into print—in School Library Journal, no less! Elizabeth Burns of A Chair, a Fireplace, and a Tea Cozy has an excellent article about the kidlitosphere in the current issue (you can read it online). I’m honored to see Here in the Bonny Glen among her list of the best book blogs. Thanks, Liz.

A Daddy’s Double Standard

First child: "Refined sugar shall not touch her lips! Until age two at the earliest! Possibly age three! Nothing but natural sweeteners for my daughter: bring on the homemade fruit leather and rubbery whole wheat muffins sweetened with apple juice!"

Fifth child:
"Does my widdle snookie-wookie want a taste of yummy  yummy marshmallow fluff? Mmm, she likes it! Here, have a chocolate-chip muffin!"

Carnival Submissions Due Tomorrow

This month’s Carnival of Children’s Literature will be hosted by the delightful MotherReader. Submissions are due tomorrow (the 15th), so pick out your best kidlit post of the month and send it her way!

Feel free to grab the lovely button in my sidebar (designed and donated by wonderful Alice Cantrell of Gardens of Grace) for promoting the carnival. And thanks again to all the volunteer hosts who help keep the CCL chugging along.

I Love His New Game

Wonderboy comes to me and delivers an incomprehensible message in whisper-sounds. I’m pretty sure he can’t even hear a whisper, but he can feel that it’s a different way of talking. Sometimes we are loud, "MOMMEEEE! WHERE GAY-GEE GO?" (The baby is on the move now, and Wonderboy finds her scoot-crawling mobility a bit stressful. Precious objects such as telephones and babies are supposed to stay where you put them. Aren’t they? Aren’t they? Where did she go? Doggone it, she’s halfway down the hall again, and I’m pretty sure she took the phone with her.)

Yes, sometimes we are loud, and sometimes we are hushed and whispery. He comes to me with his tight little grin and his proud whisper, and he pours forth a string of sotto voce gibberish, like my amateur actor friends and I used to do during party scenes in high-school plays.

His secret message thus transmitted, he giggles expectantly, eyes dancing. This is my cue: I whisper back, delivering my own incomprehensible message to ears that can’t detect these sounds even with technological assistance.

Suddenly he is all business, and he trots off down the hall to find Jane. That’s the game, see; he is carrying our messages from one end of the house to the other. I have no idea what she is saying on her end. I keep forgetting to ask her. It doesn’t really matter. We both know the substance of the message is joy.

Speaking of “Get ‘Em While You Can”

Don’t forget that the wonderful Betsy-Tacy books by Maud Hart Lovelace are in danger of going out of print. Heaven to Betsy, the fifth title in the series (and the first of the high-school books), is already OOP, I’m sorry to say. If you find a used copy, snatch it up.

It’s almost hard for me to believe, now, that I grew up without Betsy and friends. I never heard of the books until 1994, when I was a young staffer at HarperChildren’s, and the galleys for the reissues—the very editions that are now going out of print—began to float across my desk. You never saw a happier little coffee-fetcher than the girl I was, newly married and soon to be expecting baby Jane, sitting in  my cubicle devouring those galleys and getting paid for it. Not paid a whole lot, mind you, but still.

Where had Betsy Ray been all my life? Clearly she was a kindred spirit of the likes of my beloved Anne and Laura. I loved her instantly and passionately, right down to her gap-toothed smile. My own dear mama has the same smile, and I could picture Betsy’s grin exactly. (I would have it too, but for the junior-high braces.)

I had taken that job because I wanted to write, and I hoped working in a publishing house would open some doors for me. (Happily, it did.) In the evenings I would go home to the bitsy three-room Queens apartment in which Scott and I began our married life, and the whole scene was so very Betsy-and-Joe I could hardly contain myself. Betsy’s bird print above her writing desk (Uncle Keith’s trunk) reminded me of the picture I’d hung on the wall beside our computer: a sepia-toned print of a stone doorway between a courtyard and a garden, taken at a monastery we’d passed through briefly on our honeymoon. That doorway spoke to me of all the possibilities that lay on the other side. Step through, it beckoned, and see what surprises await you down these paths.

Betsy would have understood just how I felt.

Even little tiny Betsy, the five-year-old or the ten-year-old: she knew all about the fun of discovering what lay over the Big Hill or alongside the downtown streets. Her cheery disposition, her impish sense of humor, her fierce loyalty, her quarrelsome streak—she was a real and whole person, and when I discovered I was expecting a baby, I couldn’t wait, couldn’t WAIT, to share Betsy with her. Oh, but what if she were a he? Well, then, his sister. Surely, surely, there were girls in my future, my own little Betsy and a Tacy and an Anne and a Jane-of-Lantern-Hill. Right? Right?

When the Lovelace reissues came out, I got to take copies home to lay in wait for the passel of children I hoped to have. And here they are, a passel indeed, and as diehard a bunch of Betsy-Tacy fans you’ll never see—except perhaps in the Edmisten house. And, um, the Cottage. And at Dumb Ox Academy. And okay, fine, in hundreds of other homes around the world.

But hundreds of homes is not enough, not enough to generate new print runs in a world of bottom-lines. And so we’re in danger of having to say bye-bye Betsy. Will the day come when my daughters fight over who gets to have mom’s collection?

There’s one book I won’t let them fight over. I bought a bunch of copies just in case it, too, disappears, as will likely be the case one of these days. Maud Hart Lovelace’s most beautiful novel, Emily of Deep Valley, takes place in the same Minnesota village as the Betsy-Tacy books, and indeed Betsy makes a cameo appearance. Emily wasn’t part of the original relaunch plan, and when I left my job at HarperCollins to stay home with the due-any-minute Baby Who Would Be Jane, I did so with a photocopy of Harper’s library copy of Emily of Deep Valley in my backpack—a gift from one of the editors on the next floor.

Two years later the same editor sent me, triumphantly, an actual book. She’d been successful in lobbying for the reissue of Emily of Deep Valley, and I could kiss her for it. If you haven’t read this book, oh what a treat you are in for. Emily is the kind of character we don’t often see in these days of "you have to do what’s right for you." What seems "right" for Emily, devoted scholar, is a college education like the rest of her high-school chums. But she lives with a very elderly grandfather, and somehow, somehow, she can’t bring herself to leave him alone. That, her conscience whispers, wouldn’t be right.

Sometimes, you see, "right for you" isn’t the same as just plain Right.

Doing the real right thing, Emily finds, is often the hardest thing. (Wasn’t I writing about this just the other day? Emily is one of the people I learned it from.) She also finds out that the Right Thing can be like a doorway, and when you step through it, you find beauty on the other side, beauty in places you never knew existed.

That’s why I have a stack of Emily of Deep Valley tucked away for my children. She mustn’t disappear, this strong and gentle young woman who understands that love means sacrifice and cheerfulness, and the kind of love that cheerfully sacrifices blesses the giver a hundredfold. I can’t think of a finer role model for my young brood—not even Betsy or Anne or Laura.


The Betsy-Tacy books, in chronological order

The early years:

Betsy-Tacy
Betsy-Tacy and Tib
Betsy and Tacy Go Over the Big Hill 

Betsy and Tacy Go Downtown

Winona’s Pony Cart

The high-school books:

Heaven to Betsy

Betsy in Spite of Herself 

Betsy Was a Junior

Betsy and Joe

After high school:

Betsy and the Great World
Betsy’s Wedding
Carney’s House Party
Emily of Deep Valley


Related posts:

Little House news
More about my decision
Little House: answering your questions


Little House: Answering Your Questions

Is it true they are getting rid of the Garth Williams illustrations in Laura’s books?

Only in the new paperback editions with the photographic covers. The Garth Williams art will still appear in the hardcover editions of Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books, as well as the colorized paperback editions.

Are Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books being abridged?

No, only the Martha, Charlotte, Caroline, and Rose books are being abridged.

I want to buy the original, unabridged editions of your Martha and Charlotte books. How can I be sure that’s what I’m getting?

The new, abridged editions will have photo covers. The unabridged editions have the painted covers that appear in my sidebar.

Can you give me a list of all your books in order?

The Martha books are:

Little House in the Highlands
The Far Side of the Loch
Down to the Bonny Glen
Beyond the Heather Hills

The Charlotte books are:

Little House by Boston Bay
On Tide Mill Lane
The Road from Roxbury
Across the Puddingstone Dam

Oh no! Is The Road from Roxbury (unabridged) already out of print? I can’t find it at Amazon.

Try smaller booksellers such as those affiliated with the various Little House museum sites around the country.

And thank you so very much for your interest!

Related posts:
Little House news
More about my decision

Snapshot

This post isn’t going to go anywhere; I have no thesis to develop. I just wanted to capture a moment. Yesterday, in the morning rush, getting everyone ready to go on an outing, I looked up and saw Jane, kneeling beside Wonderboy, carefully fitting one of his hearing aids into his little ear.

Just that. The eleven-year-old girl, smiling, concentrating, hands deftly positioning the ear mold and tucking the aid behind the ear. The tiny boy, head patiently tilted, cooperating. The normalness of the moment: this day was nothing special, just a regular morning.

I had to blink back tears. Sometimes it fills you up and overflows, you know? That rush of emotion when you see how blessed you are? 

How grateful I am for the moment! That such tender attentions from a sister to a brother should be commonplace, that a three-year-old should have such trust and confidence in his not-really-all-that-big big sister—to glimpse that love and trust, to notice the moment before it flies past, is the best kind of gift. It’s like God pushes the pause button on the videotape of your life, and you get a rare moment to study one single still frame before it all zips back into fast-forward again.